Written by Missy 8/6/2026

What is humility? And why should I care?

Dear friend,

I want to write to you about something that has taken me some time to recognize and have in my own life. Humility. Not just the opposite of pride; or choosing to serve someone in fear. No, that is not true humility. In James chapter 3 verse 13, the author asks:

“Who is wise and understanding among you?”

This is an important question because it causes us to consider what it truly means to be wise and understanding. It goes beyond book knowledge, being able to memorize facts. This kind of understanding; this wisdom – comes from a deeper part of us. It is grown and trained by life experiences, and by walking with Jesus.

I believe that without wisdom, true humility cannot be achieved. Timothy Keller says in his book “The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness” that true humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less. I find this an excellent explanation of what it means to be humble. In today’s time we often hear people talking about self-esteem, self-care, and other such things organized around making our hearts, minds and bodies feel at ease. While none of these things are wrong, focusing too much on ourselves leads to pride and a self-centered attitude.

Please don’t take this to mean that humility means putting yourself below someone else, serving them with everything you have and more. No, true humility means having mutual respect for those around you, and considering them before you think to please yourself. It means walking into a room and instead of asking how you can be served, thinking of how you can uplift those you see.

We can see humility in Jesus’ life as he lived to lead, heal, and serve his disciples and any that came to him. He didn’t send people off because he had had enough, or because the day was over. He continued to minister and lead his sheep. This is true humility – it means thinking of others when it might cost you comfort, it means putting yourself aside for a time while you focus on someone else.

The second part of James 3:13 says,

“Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.”

Humility is not an emotion, it’s not something we feel. It is an action. It means exactly what this verse says; it is the outworking of wisdom, of true understanding. I hope that you are encouraged by this dear friend. You don’t need to strive for wisdom, for humility. Jesus offers it to us at no cost. He doesn’t need to see a list of our good deeds, of how much we’ve helped the neighbor next door weed her garden; or how many times we have fed the stray animals roaming the neighborhood.

All he asks of us is that we come to him honestly, asking for help. In our need, calling out to the only one who can truly heal all our pains and rescue us from our struggles. Friend, your Shepherd is waiting with arms open wide. He won’t push himself upon you, he will stand at the door of your heart and wait. Calmly, patiently, and always ready when you open the door. Go to him now, and see that he doesn’t come in and sit with you, ready to hold you in his loving embrace.

With love,
Missy